Why would these single men want to be with someone that physically reminds them of their ex-spouse? Do they only have one physical type? I’ve read that men in general, rate a mate’s physical appearance as first on their list, women not so much. Is the woman a man marries his one type…forever?

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I posed this question to a single guy (also divorced). He shared the idea that perhaps the men in these relationships picked familiar faces for a possible mate because they had unresolved issues and looked to resolve them with someone that resembled their ex-spouse. I could see how that could be true. He also said that if a guy resolves the issues on his own, he will probably not be so attracted to the same type of women.

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I don’t think so. I think women are more complicated. Looks are important, but do not top the scales when it comes to finding a mate. In general, I think men are more apt to date one physical type. Looks tip their scale, maybe even more so if they made a commitment to these women. I would hope my single guy friends would consider expanding their type. They may not realize just how narrow their focus is. They could be passing by an amazing woman and relationship! Now, I must say…I’m a bit obsessed with the trumpeter, Chris Botti, who resembles the blond ex-boyfriend…no type casting here!

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To some degree, we all make an unconscious choice about our type. However, I think an uncompleted relationship can make the deepest impression in our selection. It not only imprints our subconscious, but our hearts. It’s all very curious to me. Perhaps these type of relationships determine our type? If you lined up the men I’ve had relationships with, there is very little physical resemblance…short, tall, very little hair, very long hair, blond, and brunette. Had I married and then divorced one of these guys, would the guys I’m attracted look alike?

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I think we all have a "type" we are attracted to. Recently, I noticed a pattern in some of my single guy friends and wondered if there’s more to their selection process. I have a guy friend who is divorced. I’ve noticed the last couple of women that he’s been interested in resemble his ex-wife. I know another guy who married a woman that looks like his ex-wife who has a very similar name as his ex-wife. I went to an event a couple months back and a single guy was very interested in me because I had red hair. I know this because he mentioned his ex-wife had red hair.

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